5+1 = How to Find Comfort in the Uncomfortable

When I sat down with Caitlin Crews to talk about the creative life, I had no idea we were going to cover so much territory — it was a challenge to decide which things to put in and what to leave out of this interview. Really, super tough. In the end, it seemed natural to focus on knowing yourself and the recent discoveries brought into focus by the unprecedented challenges of 2020.

A little bit about Caitlin: She’s a creative specialist with a Master’s in Arts and Cultural Management from Pratt Institute and, currently, the design elements outreach (templates lead) at Adobe. Lead of Adobe’s Black Employee Network (NYC) and Adobe for All (NYC) Co-Lead, Caitlin is also a contributing writer to Got a Girl Crush (a blog and magazine about women, by women, for everyone) and a member of the International Studio & Curatorial Program that provides creative development of artists and curators. Due to the pandemic, she left Brooklyn — where she’d lived since graduating from undergrad at Kent State — and went home to Pennsylvania to work remotely and spend time with her parents while she contemplates her next move. Caitlin also really loves memes. So, if you see a witty meme, send it her way!

Can you ever really know yourself? And if so, what’s the best way?

I don’t know. I mean we’re always changing, constantly. You can know elements of yourself. But I don’t think you’ll ever know yourself because, hopefully, you’re growing and changing. It’s important to understand that. Sometimes, I can’t keep up with it…

Still, knowing that you’re going to change is a big first step. Knowing what you don’t like — what you don’t want in your life — is the best thing because that can lead you closer to what you really want. That’s truly foundational.

What in your mind is a “win”?

When you can walk away from something with no regrets, even in a hard time. A hard conversation with a friend or at work — it’s about being able to walk away feeling like you did what you had to do. Maybe that’s speaking up against something someone might normally shy away from. It’s a win if it wouldn’t have been done if you hadn’t done it. That means you have to be OK with maybe being wrong or maybe rocking the boat.

Should we care about what other people think?

I kind of go back and forth with that. Having some people in your corner is great when it comes to decision making or, really, anything at all.

There’s also this sense of needing approval from people who don’t have a say in any other part of your life. Social media is a perfect example of where people search for the approval factor. The constant seeking of approval can be detrimental.

So, I’d have to say no. People are either going to like what you’re doing or they’re not.

How do you disconnect?

It’s hard. I cook in silence or just listening to music. I’m also starting this bigger path of meditation. It’s always played a part in my life. Going to a Catholic high school, teachers were always pushing this idea of meditation. Praying and meditation.

Leaving New York was a big disconnect for me. Not caring about what’s happening or what’s going on this weekend. Taking a little bit of time for yourself and being diligent about it.

Oh, another thing…I try not to take meetings on Fridays. If I work really late one night, the next day I have to draw a line and a boundary. That’s about protecting yourself mentally. You have to do that any way that you can.

What is your takeaway from 2020?

Our CEO at Adobe said in a meeting recently that we have to get comfortable being uncomfortable. And I’ve been saying that a lot lately. It’s not going to be all rainbows and butterflies. There is just going to be stuff that’s completely out of your control. As hard as it is, you’ve got to roll with it. I can’t worry that a Christmas present that I bought might not make it there in time. It’s going to get there. It might not happen when I want it to happen.

Plans just aren’t going to happen sometimes. I never thought I’d leave New York. That was a shock to a lot of people I’m close with and to me! It has been a rough year — for everyone. It’s the more you can settle into not knowing, the better you’ll be. You just have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

+1

What’s your take on gratitude?

Gratitude is just a massive theme going into 2021. I don’t think I show gratitude enough. Like I don’t say it enough. It’s not talked about or acted upon the way it should be. People just think that it’s being done.

My take is to actually explore it. Decide what you’re thankful for and what you haven’t yet acknowledged as a good thing in your life. I’m grateful for a lot of things, but it’s a challenge to express it.